J.J. Abrams Set to Produce New Star-Studded Bowel Movement
In a turn of events that has left Hollywood insiders both amused and perplexed, acclaimed filmmaker J.J. Abrams has announced ...
Tag: Spotlight
CIA Reveals Leaked Messages Hinting at Massive Conspiracy to Ding-Dong Ditch White House.
In a revelation that has left Washington insiders and the public alike in a state of disbelief, the CIA has ...
CIA Finds Hunter Biden Laptop. Discovers Way Fucking Embarrassing 1st Draft of Shitty Novel.
In a surprising twist to the ongoing saga surrounding Hunter Biden's laptop, the Central Intelligence Agency (CIA) has made an ...
RFK Reveals Worm Dwelling In Skull In Commitment to Resolve Housing Crisis.
In a bold and unexpected display of commitment to addressing the pressing issue of affordable housing, Robert F. Kennedy Jr. ...
Mother’s Day Miracle: Vagina Voted Best Sex Organ.
This Mother's Day, a groundswell of support has emerged for an unexpected contender in the realm of sexual organs: the ...
Kanye Crowns Himself Trendsetting King; Lashes Out at “College Posers” for Copying His Anti-Semitism
In a whirlwind of controversy and self-proclamation, Kanye West, the enigmatic rap artist and fashion mogul, has once again thrust ...
99 Cents Stores Files for Chapter 11. Seeks $60m in Financing… of Which, It Has Secured Only 99 Cents.
In sad retail news today, the 99 Cents Only store chain has filed for Chapter 11 bankruptcy protection, seeking $60 ...
Popular “for Dummies” Book Series Renames “Sailing for Dummies” to More Accurate Title, “Sailing”
In response to growing criticism and calls for accuracy in its popular "for Dummies" book series, the publishers have announced ...
Disgraced, Unlicensed Dog Trainer Not Trainer At All; Just Loves Giving Puppies Treats. Fleeces Dog Owners for Millions.
In a disturbing case that has rattled the pet industry and sparked outrage among dog owners nationwide, a self-proclaimed "dog ...
Man takes out mortgage to add shrimp to salad.
In a culinary saga reflecting the evolving landscape of modern gastronomy, Mr. Theodore Henderson's decision to take out a mortgage ...
Spotlight
BlackRock Now Owns 80% of Bounce Houses in America
In a continued streak of domination for one of the world’s largest investment firms, BlackRock has quietly acquired a dominant...
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